Just finished reading "The Red Book: A Deliciously Unorthodox Approach To Igniting Your Divine Spark" and it is nothing less than a spiritual fire starter - a combustible cocktail of Hindu Tantra and Zen Buddhism, Rumi and Carl Jung, goddesses and psychics, shaken with cosmic nudges, meaningful subway rides, haircuts, relationships, sex, dreams, and intuition.

It's a book that encourages women to live more consciously so they can start making clearer choices across the board, from careers to relationships, politics to pop culture and everything in between. For smart, gutsy, spiritually curious women whose colorful and complicated lives aren’t reflected in most spirituality books.

Sera Beak is a world traveled Harvard trained scholar of comparative
religions and an intrepid spiritual cowgirl.

Here's another guest blog from Leslie Lehr.

My friend at the LA Times wrote a great editorial about how Americans work so much - often aided by so-called "labor saving" devices - that the federal holiday honoring our workforce isn't a true holiday for most. I read the article, eagerly anticipating a mention of moms - not working moms, but all moms, all of us working 24/7 without any nod from the federal government.

Most moms I know are crowding the checkout lines at Costco right now in order to celebrate the holiday with barbecues and other family events. Monday night there will be extra clean-up and laundry and and the mental preparation required for getting the kids off to a new school year (carpools, clothes, teachers) at the same time as preparing to shove five days worth of work into a four day week. As if.

Even TV commercials show how eager parents can be to get their kids back in school - the popular spot from Staples shows a man clicking his Easy button to fill his happy children with armloads of school supplies. Wish I had an easy button. It sure wouldn't involve school supplies.

My gardener stopped by to fix my white picket fence the other day (I swear) and was telling me how he told his wife she could get a job if she wanted, but with four kids, she's happy. He said she as reading a book about how women are so empowered now (my wording) and he beamed at me, a single mom trying to figure out how to afford hiring him to fix all the other stuff around the house, a said that "women are running the world now." I fought back words about the lack of daycare and health care and women running Fortune 5O0 companies and a recent TV idea of mine that got shot down by an older male producer who didn't who feel that the premise of a woman having a work/parenting conflict was current enough - and smiled. I pointed my gardener to the fence, tossed a load of laundry in the washer as I passed through the garage, negotiated with my daughter about dinner, and sat back down at my desk to work. My white picket fence looks great.

Happy Labor Day!

Another guest blog from Leslie Lehr.

After taking my daughter on a tour of colleges, it struck me how much the next four years could influence her life. Since the day our children are born, most of us wrestle with the cost of tuition and our hopes for the future – meaning where they will be accepted. But after stepping foot on half a dozen campuses, the difference in the kind of students who fit in was overshadowed by what kind of graduates come out.

The big question goes beyond city vs. country, two year transfer program or four year campus, even the fancy degree versus the favorite environment. The issue that struck me concerns to the chasm between a liberal arts education or a focused specialty school. Liberal arts students have had time to explore options, to get involved in the politics, but may have to cobble together a major and come out without solid career credentials. (Hence, graduate school). A focused trade school prepares their students to go right into their chosen career. Which is the better citizen: the productive member of society or the idealistic thinker? And who gets the final say?

Here is another guest blog by Leslie Lehr.

Last night, I took my sister to the Crosby Stills Nash & Young Concert at the Hollywood Bowl. Yes, Neil Young was there too, in the name of Peace, for the Freedom of Speech Tour. For nearly three hours, we reveled in anti-war sentiment. It was hard not to get teary eyed at the lyric "we have all been here before." No only with Iraq, but with Israel.

We grew up in Ohio, where my boyfriend's big brother was at Kent State when President Nixon ordered the National Guard to fire on the students, inspiring the CSNY lyric "four dead in Ohio." We were younger than the boys being drafted, but we wore POW bracelets all through high school. Our parents, young professors at OSU, had their cars rocked by student protesters. That environment is, I realize now, part of what drove me to marry a Vietnam Vet who became a Conscientious Objector and finally, one of the first V. Vets Against the War. It was patriotic.

At intermission, I called my teenage daughter and asked, "Where are the peace songs now?" She listed a few here and there - Rufus Wainwright, Kanye West - but it didn't seem the same or nearly enough. Is the tolerance level higher because there is no draft for Iraq? Does it seem like we are only directly affected if our loved ones enlist?

As we watched the thousands of fallen Americans faces flash on the concert screen, my sister, a network anchor in Santa Barbara, explained that since 2003 there has been such a stringent policy against photographing the flag-draped caskets of our children killed in service that it is hard to keep the deaths in the news. Evidently, if President Bush went to one funeral, cameras would follow him, but he has not, and will not, go to any.

As the concert ended, I felt as though the boomer generation has failed. I have voted in every election and I try to maintain pacifism in my own life. Yet here is this awful feeling of deja vu. The lyrics that linger now are "Teach your children."

How?

With gas prices hitting their second highest price ever, many are opting to fly to their vacations this summer instead of driving, creating an increase in passengers, experts say. Just read an article with some great tips on how to cut down your travel time.

Metal detector: I definitely have not mastered this one yet. I have gotten to where I never set it off, but I am the one fumbling around for jewelry and phone etc. and where to put them. Some, and I mean Penn Jillette and other libertarians and Cato institute folks, want to get stopped. I can remember doing a show with Penn and him whipping out a pocket-size metal copy of the Bill of Rights. The metal sets detector off and you show the Bill of Rights to the powers that be and complain that you should not be searched. Abracadabra and you have made a political statement.

But if you are like most of us I will assume you don't particularly care for being wanded and standing in that weird roped in line. The article says to "sort things at home, throw all change, cell phones and jewelry into a small plastic bag. Then, at the airport, there'll be no last-minute dance to empty your pockets. (This would also be a good time to weigh bags on a bathroom scale, to make sure they don't go over the usual 50-pound limit.)"

Another tip "don't let the kids bring any toy guns—even the water variety." Wrapped presents also not a good call, "that'll get you yanked aside." The article suggests wearing pants or shorts with draw strings (no belt buckle required). I will add two notes I have noticed as a woman: don't pack tweezers and other sharp grooming materials in your carry on bag. I know, I know the rules changed and you can now, but trust me, not all employees got the memo. Want to keep this G rated, but let me just say avoid things with under wire, it makes the wanding even more unbearable.

Since name tags can fall off, as a safety precaution the article suggests you "slip your itinerary (with a phone number) in a side zipper." And maybe black is not the new black--everyone has a roller one so if yours is different you will be able to spot it better, less chance of bags getting mixed up, and you will be able to describe it easier if it does get lost".

Bon Voyage!

Guest blog by Leslie Lehr

Planning a college tour for my daughter raises the same issues that have been tearing at my gut since she entered kindergarten. Do I encourage her towards the cultural education of a gritty urban universities or the privileged class of students at a pastoral private college? My younger daughter is just entering high school and I have to admit there's a part of me that wishes she were going to the ritzy school across the country line - and not just because it's actually closer to home.

As I watch friends choose private schools that offer smaller classrooms and personal attention and - be still my heart - field trips, I am jealous. I want that for my kids, too. The financial excuse is easy, but if I really wanted to pull it off with scholarships and whatnot, maybe I could.

That greater part of me, the one that believes that every kid has the right to an equally good education, gives me pause. How can that utopia ever happen if I don’t participate in the experiment? And isn't spending six hours a day immersed with children who speak seventeen different languages the best education of all?

Then again, don't I want them to get into a good college? Make lifelong friends who happen to have tremendous business contacts? Am I sacrificing my kids for the good of the country? Does the country even notice? Will my kids?

You have heard about her work on the Today Show, in Vanity Fair, Newsweek, Business Week, Elle, Parenting, you name it. I am proud to say Leslie Lehr has become a citizen hunter and will be a regular guest blogger for our Work at Home Mom Corner.

Leslie is the author of several humorous parenting books. Mommy Wars, her new book about Working Moms versus Stay-at-home Moms, is excerpted in WAHM. Read her entries, share your stories, and ask her questions.

"The way to be a good mom is still a mystery and one that overlaps with how to be a good citizen and how to have a good life. Because being a good role model is also important. " Leslie

Being a stay at home mom is no picnic. Neither is being a working mom. All moms are worthy of respect.

Those of us who can still buy groceries on one income are lucky to have the choice of having a career in addition to the enormous job of being a mother. Despite knowing full well that it was impossible to have it all, at least at the same time, I was sort of pressured to stay home by the impossible hours and lack of family support of the careers my husband and I had chosen. Still, my attempt to be a good mom and still feed my ambition made me hate everyone.

I still am jealous of women who are completely at peace with staying home or vice versa, because trying to be a good citizen and be productive in society without living through the children and still raising the children to be productive good citizens is a real struggle. I hated working moms who had someone else to do the grunt-work and could afford luxuries and I hated stay at home moms who had time to read the newspaper and play tennis. In fact, today I am resentful that I have to cut my writing short - important stuff -because school gets out early and it's my carpool day.

But I recently spoke on a panel at a Wharton Business School Alumni breakfast and it was interesting to see what choices many smart young women were making. The new mothers tend to be very confused. Then they piece together temporary solutions which evolve into a new business model. Similar to how employees can no longer count on IBM to take care of them forever and must develop more individual careers, this new generation of mothers was starting to identify the painful and forced changes of motherhood as an example of how each person is a separate business, a business that is constantly re-evaluating and developing new strategy in order to be successful, that is, to raise beloved children and still have a separate identity and contribution to society.

Here's an excerpt from the book:

Last week after Caty Joy was dropped off from school by Karen, the stay-at-home mom/afternoon carpool driver, my daughter barged into my home office and plopped down on the loveseat.

"What does Karen do all day?" she asked.

I hit Save on my computer while I frantically racked my brain for an answer appropriate for a twelve year old. She waved a Xerox from career day in front of my face as an explanation for her query. I scanned the career categories. "Mother" wasn't on the list.

Caty Joy had to know that Karen was PTA Vice President, Brownie troop leader, and Room Mother every year. How could she forget getting a ride home whenever I ran late? What about all the times I stashed her at Karen's house for an hour or two when I had to drive her sister somewhere? How could she take Karen so utterly for granted?

I had to think of an answer that would show how important stay-at-home-moms are, but not so important that Caty Joy would think of becoming one. She needed to multiply fractions so she could stay on the Honor Roll, get into an Ivy League college, and choose a good career. Something with an employment contract and stock options. Then, like a zap from Mother Nature, I remembered that Karen also did the books for her husband's small company. But if I mentioned that, would it take away the value of Karen's time at home and in the school? My brain seized from the mental whiplash.

"You know she volunteers a lot," I began. "Plus, she's a mom."

My daughter thought about this for a moment. She wiped cookie crumbs from her mouth and nodded.

"She's a good one," she said.

I smiled and blinked back tears. Did that mean I was not a good one? Should I have skipped that business call, and picked her up with a plate of warm cookies perched on top of the steering wheel? Then Caty Joy took a pencil from my desk and printed "Mother" on her list. I felt better.

I don't really hate anybody, especially not mothers. It's the hardest and most important job in the world. Yet we are important, too. There is no prefect way to be a mother - or even a way to know if you are a good one. So the real battle is raging in our heads - mine, anyway. I have no idea if my working at home has helped my daughters. The first time my daughter brought home a bad grade, I freaked out. I didn't give up my ambition of running Paramount Pictures for my daughter to fail a stupid math quiz. I felt like I failed. It took a really long time, but finally I realized that I didn't stay home for my daughter at all. I stayed home for me.

What We Can Do to Help

The study out of the University of California shows that middle school and high school age kids with depressive symptoms engaged in riskier sexual behavior.

Like many studies it just lends more specifics and empirical evidence to something that is just plain common sense. When bummed out or depressed, many will seek comfort in sex as others do in drugs or alcohol. They may think that sex will provide the escape from the isolation that depression brings. Many who are depressed self-medicate and sex can be strong medicine.

Without these higher risks caused by depression the picture is already bleak on teens and irresponsible sex. Teens make up over half of new cases of STD's and have a higher risk of contracting HIV.

Not only should this be a reminder to talk to our kids about the dangers, risks, and responsibilities that come with being sexually active, it should also remind us to keep the lines of communication open not just with our only children, but those we might mentor or know. Parents and others should be on the lookout for signs of depression so that they can lend support and also seek professional help if needed. I won't weigh in on the whole Tom Cruise Lauer interview except to say that while I have often thought our children are far too medicated in this country (ADD? I thought all kids had that), it is true that depression can be debilitating both physical and emotionally and should not be taken lightly.

Warning signs for depression in kids and teens vary from those found in adults. Here are some warning signs I have read about over the years from various publications:

Guest blog by Leslie Lehr:

It has been a whirlwind of school's-out celebrations since Mother's Day and now that Independence Day is at hand, mothers are particularly aware that there is no such thing.

On the news front, once Elizabeth Vargas retired from her network anchor spot, feminists have blamed her for absconding the glory path to making things easier for future working moms, forgetting the that the mom part has equal weight. In a perfect world, she could get that job back later, right?

Two weeks ago, political pundits were all a-twitter with a new book called Get To Work, in which the author claims that feminism isn't about a woman’s choice to work or be a stay-at-home mom at all, it’s about the right working. You know, a 'real' job. The author almost had me until she said women should marry down, to make sure they can't afford to stay home. Keep her away from my daughters!

Then last week, the breast milk proponents went the La Leche League one better by claiming that women who don’t breastfeed should be ticketed. It wasn't long ago we got ticketed for breastfeeding in public. And of course the abortion debate is back in the news. Get out of my panties, my bra and my house!

What's the good of independence if everyone is telling us what to do?

Since Citizen Hunter began, mornings have now become my favorite part of the day because I get to read all of your e-mails about the great things you guys are doing in your community to make a difference. Your words and deeds inspire me more than you know.

I am particularly impressed with young Citizen Hunters like Nathan Dorfman who take action even during their summer vacations. He responded to the Fast Food issue in the action center, learned as much as he could about the topic, and took action. Thanks Nathan, I have learned a lot from our conversation, and know other Citizen Hunters will as well.

Don't forget to take action like Nathan did to help get fast food out of our public schools. In case any of you thought 15 year olds were just playing Playstation for the summer, I thought I would share his email:

America’s Trans-Fat Crisis
By Nathan Dorfman
Age 15

2006: More than 95% of Americans are either overweight or obese. The numbers of national heart disease and stroke victims are skyrocketing. Why is this happening? Yes, lack of exercise as well as poor family genes are two reasons. However, one underrated but important cause is trans-fat.

Trans-fat, also known as partially hydrogenated oil or vegetable shortening, is produced by partially combining originally healthy oil with hydrogen. More than an innocent food ingredient, trans-fat contributes to about 30,000 heart-related deaths per year, according to Harvard Medical School experts. Trans-fat gradually damages human arteries, causes significant weight gain and increases risk for both cancer and diabetes. In addition, a University of South Carolina experiment, involving rats, proved that when eaten regularly, trans-fat decreases focus ability and intelligence. These negative effects are disturbing. Yet worse is how many Americans, especially children, eat trans-fat on a daily basis… unknowingly.

Found in countless processed baked snacks, most fried foods, margarine and candy; trans-fats have entered restaurants and supermarkets. Quite despicably, they are common in school cafeterias, too. It is appalling to know Americans are exposed and accustomed to trans-fats at such young ages. No wonder the national medical bill is climbing in cost.

Believe it or not, there are reasons why we consume trans-fats continuously. First, most individuals are not aware that trans-fats are harmful. Some may know nothing about trans-fats altogether. For instance, most schools serve trans-fatty meals, but fail to teach students nutrition. In television ads, viewers are told about a food’s great taste, not its high fat content or lack of nutrition.

Second, trans-fats are convenient. In schools, trans-fatty foods are reasonably priced and often the only meals served. Therefore, such foods are ultra-accessible to students. This may explain why more children are becoming overweight. There is psychological convenience as well. Plenty of harmful foods are advertised by children’s cartoon characters. Many nutritious foods are not. Children associate unhealthy food with the characters who advertise it.

Third, trans-fats are addictive. Foods with trans-fats have a pleasant, soft mouth-feel, which makes them somewhat habit-forming. This texture causes people to enjoy eating such foods regularly. Why must becoming obese be so easy for children today?

Some may wonder why food companies use trans-fats if they are unhealthy. For food was supposed to nourish us, not kill us, right? One reason is that snack foods with trans-fats have longer shelf-lives than those without. Another is that the use of trans-fats is cheaper for food companies than the use of nutritious oils, like canola. However, I believe human health must take priority, don’t you?

Disappointingly, because of corporate lobbyists and unaware citizens, trans-fats may remain in America for a while. Still, there are choices you can make to stay healthy. First, you can read nutrition and ingredient labels on food packages. If partially hydrogenated oil or shortening is listed, DO NOT EAT IT, since both are trans- fats. You can also exercise, or consume essential fatty acids, like EPA and DHA, which reduce risk of heart disease. DHA increases focus ability as well. Try taking artificial colors, sweeteners and flavors out of your diet, and avoid chemical preservatives (like sodium nitrite). When buying bread, consider brands that use 100% whole grain.

If you also want to keep America healthy, express your feelings to restaurants, food companies, and most importantly school districts. For school districts should eliminate trans-fats, just as many have done with soda. To create a larger impact, write to politicians, whether on the local, state, or national level. Some U.S. cities have already combated trans-fats with success. For example, thanks to Mayor Giuliani, trans-fat usage is discouraged in New York City restaurants. In Tiburon, California restaurants, trans-fats are eliminated completely.

Denmark legislature, in 2003, passed a bill which banned trans-fat from the entire nation. To me, this is very impressive, and even more inspiring. There is no reason why similar results can not occur in Philadelphia, or America, as a whole. I want to take action towards a healthier city and nation, and hope that you do as well. For as citizens, we will make a difference.

Thanks to Nathan. If you would like to write a guest blog about an issue Citizen Hunters should get involved with, send it in.

To begin our conversation on moms and the valued role they play in building our citizens of future, I wanted to share with you a blog I found called A Mom's Life, by Meredith Sinclair. As I read through her entries I really thought she grasped the importance of how mom's play a significant part in a child's being while at the same time, struggle to maintain their own identity as an individual, a woman, sometimes the "girl" in us and yes, a contributing citizen.

The first entry I feel in love with was her take on the child/mom psychotherapy exercise entitled Play-doh Therapy. (Here's My reaction to that entry.) Please give it a read and check out her site for more interesting takes on one of our unsung heroes.

You have heard about her work on the Today Show, in Vanity Fair, Newsweek, Business Week, Elle, Parenting, you name it. I am proud to say Leslie Lehr has become a citizen hunter and will be a regular guest blogger for our Work at Home Mom Corner.

Leslie is a prize-winning novelist, screenwriter, and the author of several humorous parenting books. Her latest essay, lauded by Katie Couric, is in Mommy Wars, the new Random House anthology about Working Moms versus Stay-at-home Moms. "I Hate Everybody" is excerpted in WAHM. Read her entries, share your stories, and ask her questions.

Do your children read the newspaper? Watch the news? Have any idea what is happening in the world beyond your driveway? As Flavia says, big media is a risky source, and I'm not one to argue. My sister is a network correspondent in Santa Barbara, and I can only guess how tough it must be for a producer to choose a balanced news report and keep her job when the corporations need ratings to sell the advertising space that supports them. As for the paper chase, I read several to keep up. Okay, that's a lie, I read one, skim several others. And to be truly honest, I check my horoscope first. But when I was a kid, we were quizzed on current events starting in fourth grade.

Last Sunday, there was a fabulous front page full of exciting news on every front. It included historical documents on Judas & Jesus, court events in the Enron Scandal, the yellow-ribboned despair for an MIA in Iraq, details about Bush and the CIA 'leak', and deaths from volcanic sinkhole at Mammoth. I wanted my children to know about all of it.

First, I asked my 16 year old of she had heard about the Judas document. This kids clicks through images faster than I can see them. I wedged myself between her face and her computer screen to make eye contact. She was well aware of the news, nearly disdainful that I had to ask. We had a nice discussion until she broke eye contact and I noticed the mess on her desk. And, um, mentioned it. Maybe I should have guessed from the poster of Anderson Cooper on her wall, but her friends surf the Internet like hungry piranha, ingesting huge amounts of information from various sources and deciding for themselves. One down.

Next I went to my 14 year old, the fashionista shortstop. She uses the Internet for homework, but mostly for instant messaging when her cell phone is out of battery power. She is great about only calling me on her cell phone, but since I upgraded the model for her birthday, I learned the hard way that she can text faster than she can talk. Did she know what was happening in the world? Not a clue, beyond hearing me rant. As much as I want her to agree with me, I don't want to be the source of all her opinions. So I made her sit down with me to discuss the day's headlines. Before I drove her to the mall.

As a work-at-home mom, I feel horrible to have missed this opportunity. Sure, I've shared the occasional articles of interest. But I usually throw out the paper at the gym or put it immediately in the recycling bin to avoid clutter. And, despite having a mother who is addicted to every news show on TV - and not only to make sure my sister is still the best - I hate hearing bad news on TV after a long day. Especially when I've heard the big stories while procrastinating on-line.

Inspiring our kids to be responsible, involved adults means we can't depend on schools that have more and more history to teach them. Like everything else important, education starts at home. Since our family activities preclude a daily dinner, I'm starting a tradition of discussing current events at Sunday dinner. It's a start. Now I just have to commit to the Sunday dinner.

It is so important as parents or siblings that we help make sure kids understand that they have the power to make a difference in the world.

Getting trick or treat boxes to raise money for UNICEF (they're free) is a fun and easy way for kids to help kids! I am sure you have seen these orange boxes around before. Order yours today!

I am proud to say this great idea, which has saved countless lives, was started by a Philadelphia youth group and their pastor in 1950 as a Halloween project called Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF. It is now a nationwide, year-round mobilization of young people engaged as active global citizen hunters, helping some of the world's most disadvantaged and vulnerable children. I like that the boxes explain the concrete ways the money your child raises will help.

President Bill Clinton's Healthy Schools Program had a big victory last week.

The major beverage companies have agreed to only sell juice, water, and milk to kids in elementary and middle school, and only diet soda to high school kids. Child obesity is a serious public health problem and what our children eat and drink these days is taking years off their life. While we have some momentum let's push our kids schools to drop junk food too! Get involved and take action.

UPDATE 6/13: Doctors call for 'fat tax' on Coca-Cola and Pepsi

Help make sure graduating seniors are registered to vote. Join other moms and go to your local highschool to let kids know how important it is to get engaged. This site gives a helpful toolkit, a letter to send to your local highschool, and all the tips a Citizen Hunter needs.

The May issue is Green and is printed entirely on recycled paper, thanks to a sponsorship from Aveda. The entire issue is devoted to the subject of the environment. You will get fast and simple ways to green-up your homes and read interviews with enviro-leaders such as Robert Kennedy, Jr. (Waterkeeper Alliance, NRDC attorney), Tensie Whelan (Rainforest Alliance), Majora Carter (Sustainable South Bronx), and lots more. It is always great to use our wallets to make a statement - "money talks" and, well, you get the point.

For May anyway, you can have your guilty pleasure, Guilt Free!

Ever since Ms. Magazine sponsored the first Take Your Daughter to Work Day, I looked forward to that inspiring my daughters to choose fascinating careers and excel in the workplace. When boys were invited, too, it seemed only fair. Why not make it a national holiday?

The problem was, at first I didn’t work outside the home. Should I have let the girls stay home and help with the laundry? Talk about a lack of respect for full-time moms. Should I have let them sit in a corner and watch me type? Boring! Their father seemed to always be working out of town on that special day. The one time the girls made it on to a Hollywood soundstage, they were trapped there for twelve hours, coloring and eating licorice.

Many companies sponsor special days, with group activities and childcare that hardly show what a real office workday is like. Maybe the reality would be too boring. If your parent is a firefighter, the reality could be too dangerous. In theory, it’s a great idea, but as is too often the case, only a few kids really benefit.

Old-fashioned career days are still a good bet. Or maybe, parents with exciting jobs could take more than one child. Oh wait – that’s what field trips are all about. Unfortunately, in my children’s LA public school, those are far and few between. If companies really want to inspire kids, maybe they could provide buses. Better yet, they could contribute to local schools. But I digress.

What do you think about Bring Your Child to Work Day? Have your children had good experiences?

Citizen Hunters, we need your good work: Stay Healthy!

Aristotle was on to something when he talked about the link between a healthy body and healthy mind. Never be too busy to play a sport or to exercise your body, and most importantly, visit your doctor regularly.

One of my DN blogger colleagues, Kimberly Garrison, has a great check list for Check Ups, when and what. Tips to stay fit and healthy as well.

Many people give the role of motherhood a lot of positive lip service. They speak about it being the most important job there is, or comment on how vital good mothers are for the world. But for those who make the choice to be full time moms, they can suddenly be faced with the notion of being "just a mom".

We call them "stay-at-home" moms. The women who choose to forego paid employment to rear, nurture, and grow tomorrow's citizens. But not many "stay-at-home" moms I know stay at home all that much. Instead, they can be more readily found on playgrounds, in supermarkets, in chairs at pre-school board meetings, volunteering in classrooms, running school fundraisers, working the cafeteria lines, serving on the PTA, organizing community events, and attending countless classes and after school activities. They also get to be the ones who are at home to nurse their sick children, be their child's first reading, math and science teacher, and work "at home" teaching and training the most important commodity they have.

Women who choose the job of motherhood really do work. And while some believe that a well educated woman who chooses to "stay home" and raise children is wasting her potential, those who truly understand the job description realize how very smart of a choice being a full-time mother really is.

Women who choose full-time motherhood are the first teachers of tomorrow's citizens. When we begin to fully appreciate and celebrate the choice of full-time motherhood, we will no longer make well educated and dynamic women feel that choosing to raise their own kids is a waste of their skills and potential. Powerful, smart and creative women who are able to choose full-time motherhood, and do, should be applauded for both their insight, and foresight.

Got an e-mail question about kids and politics (look for a blog item in the future about that) and going to cultural events. Thought I would throw the latter one out to more experienced pros on the subject since I have had little to no success getting my siblings to come with me to museums.

I went to the art museum with my dad every Sunday (the Free day) growing up - the soft pretzel stand out front was a huge draw! I do think that exposing kids to various cultural events, getting them excited about public service and civics and nurturing a love of reading are all important in preparing our next generation of leaders to be good citizens.

As far as cultural outings and kids, I vaguely remember reading an article in Town and Country (yes, I do read things besides the Economist) on the topic, and here are a few pointers I recall from it:

You should summarize the plot of a play, ballet, opera, whatever you are going to as a bedtime story and can re-tell it in a fun way before the performance starts.

You can also read books where characters go to a Museum, like Babar's Museum of Art - this is obviously a book selection for younger kids.

Being excited about what you are going to is a must, enthusiasm is contagious and kids tend to follow your lead.

Anyway that's all I got, calling for back-up!

On Tuesday Jan. 31 in his column, Nicholas Kristoff pointed to a Gerber study that shows that french fries are the "vegetable" American infants and toddlers eat most! One-third of young children don't eat any vegetable daily and 20% of kids 19-24 mo. eat french fries every day. He also reminds us of the outrageous fact that babies born in the U.S. are less likely to survive their first year than babies born in Slovenia.

I am not blaming it all on McDonald's, I eat there from time to time along with IHOP, Burger King, Waffle House you name it. Moderation is the key.

No need to blame yourself - if this study by Gerber describes your child's diet, just resolve to do better! Our lives have become increasing complicated, we work longer for less money, and have less family support because our relatives are spread out all over the country.

To say that child care is too expensive and inflexible is a major understatement. I watch my dad and many parents who love their kids and want the best for them order Pizza and get fast food more than they should because there just aren't enough hours in the day.

One suggestion, cook in bulk over the weekend, it takes the same time to make more helpings of the same dish, freeze it and take it out in the morning and then pop it in at night. In college, trying to avoid the freshman 15 and manage time between activities, my studies and sports I did this and do it still. In terms of snacks there are fun ways to make veggies and fruit appealing--dips are always good and yogurts are great for on the go.

We talk about keeping our kids off drugs (a very important topic which will be discussed in future blogs and guest bloggers will join in, but remember obesity kills more Americans than Heroin does!) Good habits must start in youth!

How about those who say well I do my best at home, but they eat garbage at school what can I do?

Kristoff echoes a call to action I have mentioned on TV in the past. We should ban soda, potato chips, and other junk food in our schools. Make your concerns known to your school and if I hear from you that this concerns you as much is does me I will make it my business to discuss this issue even more than I already do.

I found the strangest place to buy books I love for parents, Joseph E. Bank, yeah the preppy suit store--please don't turn me in to all my cool fashion police friends who I keep swearing to that I am weaning myself off of Talbott's Ann Taylor etc. It hasn't exactly "taken" yet. Anyway these books are my new legit cover. My top 3 picks are:

This month the mag has two articles I enjoyed. The first was good kid gifts for under $20. Whether taking my siblings to b-day parties or going to a party for one of my friends kids I have come to think I have to break the bank if I want to get something special. The toys they showed were not junk, in fact I liked some of them more than priceier things I have gotten in the past.

The article on being a peaceful parent was also good. Again, as you have probably figured out by now, I am not a parent, and I still find all of this advice very helpful. In my crazy life I need all the help I can get on how to be more peaceful.

This article echoed my feelings that there are times it is impossible to chill or not lose it, but the columnist and pediatrician say not so, it's just that counting to ten is not enough. Moms share their advice--some of my take- aways:

We set the tone--convert chaos into calm and others may be able to do it. Plus it provides a sense of comfort when you appear to have things under control.

Try to reverse roles--how would you want to be treated if you were that child or person. Here's the nuance--I once had a very smart man tell me that I was too tied into the Jude o-Christian framework of do onto others as you would have them do unto you. I said "what's wrong with that". He replied don't be so literal, don't treat people how you want to be treated, treat people how they want to be treated. I know it took me a bit to totally get that. Just think about it

Visualize and internalize the parent you want to be. I forget who said it, maybe one of those proverbs I saw it on a bookmark at Borders some time back. It goes something like, it is never too late to be the person you think you are or want to be or something like that. I remember feeling relieved since I only have brief moments where I am the person I know I can be and want to become.