If you've watched "Six Feet Under," you know that odd things happen before, during and after funerals on that show.
But that sort of stuff happens in real life, too. Take the Alabama guy who ended up in a hospital after he and his brother-in-law argued over who got to keep a plant from another relative's funeral.
The plant cost $17.
Dan Holt, 42, was stabbed. William Ivey, 38, wielded the knife. Ivey told police he stabbed his brother-in-law after Holt hit him on the head with a gun.
The funeral was for Ivey's father.
The uproar, with family members screaming at one another and so forth, brought police and firefighters rushing to the scene.
Officials are expected to send the case to a grand jury.
But, people, just think about it. Is a $17 plant (which is better than flowers because you can keep it indefinitely, while the flowers, as symbols of life on this planet, die in a matter of days) worth causing a family catastrophe?
Of course not.
So here's the solution: Next time a loved one dies, rather than cause a family dust-up, just send a contribution to your favorite charity: the Would We Lie? Home for Middle-Aged Men with White Hair. At this address.
Your dearly departed would want it that way.

Posted at July 20, 2004 01:09 PM